Understanding the Fair Housing Act: Why do people discriminate?

While I am creating my portfolio for Multi Listing Service descriptions, I came across with this term, "Fair Housing Act." This act is implemented in US Real Estate settings to which it entails that people have the right to housing regardless of age, religion, sexual orientation, race, status, gender and disability and it strongly discourages people to discriminate others.

When this would be applied in making Multi Listing descriptions, you cannot say for example "This stunning house is perfect choice for gay couples in ...." because it gives an impression that it becomes inclusive to only a certain group and discriminating. 

To understand further about it, I went to see a  video from National Association of Realtors on YouTube and from there this act has a deeper roots and it emphasizes how this act have protected many people. Eventhough this act is on effect up to this day and most people strongly supports it but still there are others who is not in favour of it and still discriminates people either indirectly or subconsciously.

It can't be helped but to think, why there are some people likes to discriminate people? Is there any deeper reason? or do they have a strong basis from it? or simply discriminates out of nowhere or simply follow what the society or trend tells to them.

Here are some of the reasons that I do feel that leads them into this discriminating behaviors.

First is their past experiences or incidences from the kind of people, they are discriminating with. For instance, they have past experience with Africans who are difficult or aggressive. This incident might be over but if there is another African who wants to buy the property, the neighborhood might not accept him because of the past encounter with the previous Africans who visits the place. This can be also applied to someone who has some aggression issues or past criminal offenses that people on the neighborhood will not welcome them.

We can also observed that there is some stereotyping going on because from a small negative behavior, it then completely associates with a certain kind of people and we forget the fact that although they belong to same race or kind of people but it doesn't mean that all of them are doing the same negative behaviors or being a bad bunch of people.

Sometimes some people trust their own intuition about someone before they accept this person in. They may not know the person fully however if they feel something that is having a bad vibes then they will make a decision based from that and instead of doing verification or understand person or people concerned about their real situation.

Next reason in line is, in some countries have accepted people from different nationalities to migrate, study, work or set a business however some people are not in favour of the sight of them. They have this assumption that these foreigners would take everything from them like getting jobs or claim benefits. With the clash of differences in terms of appearance, orientation and values, it may look fine at the surface but deep within there is this brewing tension in the neighborhood.

Discrimination against the vulnerable people and those with disability is also evident in some neighborhoods and what I can see the reason for some people is, they discriminate because of the lack of resources that could support them or it could be their only excuse and simply their personal bias kicks in. One of the neighbors may comment that "You are better of with the other neighborhood." It may sound as if nothing sinister with this comment or it could be well meant but for others there is a hidden hatred of some sorts and this is no good atmosphere in the neighborhood.

Another set of vulnerable people that receiving discrimination are the hoarders, some people are often misunderstood them as difficult people to live with and the hoard that they create affects also the health of their love ones and the neighbors nearby but if you go deeper with the problem, the person concern definitely needs a careful help and not all people have the time to understand that and they would only prioritize first is themselves.

These are the reasons that I do think why discrimination happens based from my observations however there are still more and newly set of reasons that would possibly come in formation or haven't been mentioned. 

Here are some of the things I realized, when we encounter new people on the block, we don't have the time to think, verify and get to know the person on a personal level we have have an immediate tendency to use our biases and judgments or we treat that person poorly but we don't have a rational or valid basis as to why we are doing that or it could be the other way that you as one of the residents that is aware about your rights and you encountered a neighbor that is difficult however you are hesitating to report it the management or with the right authorities for the fear of confrontation and you are misunderstood as someone who discriminates others while you simply asserting boundaries and your rights about your safety. Your success of asserting your rights would depend on a tactful communication and applying the right measures.

During the course of our lives, meeting difficult and discriminating people are inevitable however whatever their behavior towards you always keep your ground and know your rights and be aware of the legal laws and right measures in dealing with these kind of people. We also need to accept the fact that eventhough we paid for the property, we cannot always do everything we want (for example making some loud noise and music at night while the neighborhood is settling themselves to sleep or bringing unknown item that jeopardize the safety of everyone without the consent). Before we do anything new in our neighborhood, the first thing we must do is to review and see if it complies with the Home Owners Association (HOA) and seek consultation and permission from them is possible. It is important to be mindful about your neighbors and the living dynamics in that community to maintain harmonious and peaceful living relationship with them.

As for neighbors who are having judgements towards others, it would be better to understand your whys and what is your valid reasons of doing such behavior and see yourself if you are on their situation. Would you be happy if you are being receiving a bad treatment just like them?

To see the change you are seeking, having passive aggressive behaviors or even a direct form of aggression wouldn't help anyone nor solve any issues. Let your needs and boundaries be known by having an open and honest communication about it. Sometimes by talking about your side of things makes people understand where you are coming from and they mentioned theirs. They will adjust accordingly or it could be that you set your expectation bars too high that people cannot simply keep up with it. Learn to have compassion to others and compromise a bit so everyone can reach a common ground to leave harmoniously.

Regulating our emotions, compassion and communicating with others effectively are things that we need in these tough situations. We know that life is tough to some, so why you add the burden by discriminating the people because they are different to you and they have nothing against you personally. Just like you, they are also trying to cope with life. Get to know people more instead of letting your assumptions, judgments and suspicions about someone gets ahead of you. If the person is confirmed as posing a threat to someone or the majority, that's the time legal measures takes place. Regardless whether you follow the Fair housing act & other housing acts in US and in other countries and is experiencing discrimination then these are the thoughts to reflect by and we need an appropriate mindset to take an action.

Why some people don't accept gay people & other members of the LGBT group?

Did you know why some people are against gay people and the LGBT group? That's because some of them asserts too much about their rights or letting people know who they are in an aggressive way. We do not need that aggressiveness. If people wanted to respect you that's great if not just let them be.

Even though people might reject you because on how you see yourself but if you continue to love, practice kindness & compassion, whatever negative they say doesn't affect you because you know yourself more & there are people who still appreciates and accepts you as a person. ✨🌈

Being grateful for the day

 

I am grateful that for today, I have received a positive feedback from Surge regarding with some of my portfolio works and hopefully it would be the same thing applies to my other REVA works and another thing that I have to be grateful of is I have managed to attend the Toastmasters despite the worry that I might not make it because I am still doing my other task for my REVA training but now, I did manage it however I do feel that I need to keep working on with confidence and how will I able to make coherent and having quality structure of speeches and to do that I need a lot of public exposure and making a ruckus to myself, well in a positive way.

For this evening as I attended the Toastmasters, I learned some of the new skills to reflect by. Well if I want to make some progress, I do strongly feel that I have to be consistent with the plan, be open for new learnings and let go of the things that doesn't align with progress and the negativity. I would be making these positive changes a reality. Thanking God, for leading me to something to accomplish and also meaningful. ✨🙏✨👏🫶

Would you trust the power of Graphic AI?

So okay guys, first of all I enjoyed watching some Bollywood films and as a Filipino and Asian, there are some culture and traditions from India that are similar to ours and also, I enjoyed the uniqueness of Indian culture & traditions that we can learn about.

From this.......an odd idea came up to my mind. What if I become an Bollywood actress? However I don't want to spend a lot of time on dressing up and putting a make up.

To make my dream possible, I went to Playground AI, one of Graphic generated AIs.

I have put a prompt to turn my selfie into a Bollywood actress.

I tried my luck hoping that I would look glamorous like Madhuri Dixit, Aishwarya Rai, Suchitra Sen, Rekha & others but it turns out like this....

So, what I am thinking is probably I am a Bollywood actress from the 80's?

But I have to admit that I am still hoping for a better one, so I tried to generate again and this time, yes it has the same look but there are some improvements. It became more realistic but still I find the eyes a little bit disturbing.

Well guys, from my experience that I got would you trust the power of Graphic AIs?

In my opinion, if you really want a high-quality result, we have to make further research to which Graphic AI can produce that otherwise it can give us some hilarious results. 

If you are looking for surprise and fun, Playground AI and other similar AI can be a great choice for you. 

That's all about my funny experience using Graphic AI. Enjoy reading and have a great day!

From the left is my original photo then from the upper right is first generated photo then the lower right is the second one.

Dealing with negative comments and people on social media or even outside of it.

 

There is this saying that you cannot please people around you. No matter what you say or do that is well meant, there would some people who are going to misunderstand you or get skeptical at your motives or even think of trying to pull you down.

We may try to fight back and explain ourselves to those people who misunderstood us but for some situations instead the issue gets being clear, things turn against us that you are the one who ends up as an offender than the one who bash you. While others cannot see a healthy criticism or feedback, they easily offended but what they don't see is this one can appear hurtful but if you see it for a different light, it brings you more growth to succeed.

It is a human nature that we react on certain things and think that the other person who provide us negative comments attacks us personally than to think deeper, reflect and see it as an insight.

To deal with these negative comments, we have to consider these points.
First is, these people saw what they have seen from the outside never seen your whole story, this is why whatever they say take it is a grain of salt and don't be affected. People have different perception of things, and it is easy to judge, form assumptions and dive to misunderstandings than to go deeper to the situation and think carefully. However, if you see that you are truly at fault then apologize. When you are angry as you see those harsh comments, be silent and think carefully and let days pass before you even reply or better if none at all and ignore. You don't owe them an explanation especially no matter how you explain things to them, they want to hear what is pleasing to them.

Second is think if what they say would benefit you in the long run by simply seeing it on a different light. Be calm, open and receptive and don't see these statements as a way to attack you in person but it is an opportunity for you to learn what people like or don't like and also identify yours as well and make necessary actions that suits you, understanding yourself and your boundaries.

For those who are working towards a goal, never listen to naysayers or people who drain your energy. Believe on yourself and your capabilities and continue working towards it. You focus on self-care, self-improvement and self-betterment, your priorities and what you want to achieve. When you give focus to these it gives you direction and you are not easily influenced and pressure by others.

Avoid gossips and be affected by it. If people are acting behind your back and makes gossips through comments or other means do not join them. Joining would be a waste of your time and energy and you may also hurt the other person who is the subject of gossip. Gossips can be entertaining but it destroys relationships. There are other things that are matter instead of listening to it. Seek for the truth of the situation by communicating to the person concern or if not, time and events will always tell the truth. Be mindful with our relationships with others, be kind & compassionate and always seek for quality. and substance.

When we receive harsh comments, it is natural that we also received lots of rejections especially to those people who have different values and mindsets. To deal with these rejections, we need to be self-compassionate. By practicing self-compassion despite of the flaws we have, we also discover our strengths as a person and become resilient and continue to move forward. Although we have family, friends and support people that can protect and defend us, but the inner work will always come from within. If you want to change your situation, it will always start from you. Not all the time they are always there and from there we need to be strong. Those rejections would also determine whose people are meant for you and acts at the best of your interest. It is time to weed out people who don't elevate us to the higher purpose. Remove yourself from toxic people.

We also try to understand where these people are coming from because there are times people are behaving that way because they feel insecure about themselves. It is also hard for them to accept a different perspective of things while others are dealing stress, and they don't have the right emotions and communication skills to deal with it. We need to see the bigger picture as we also being aware of the details, use it on the right way. There are some people through time realize their fault and make an apology.

All in all, in dealing with these negative comments and feedback whether you are the commenter or receiver, we need to have the strong sense of self. Before we even speak and act, we can also apply the "Four Way Test" of the Rotary club.

- Is it the Truth?

- Is it fair to all concerned?

- Will it build good will and better friendships?

- Will it be beneficial to all concerned?

When you are currently into this situation, I hope that this article would help you deal with this predicament. Thank you for reading and have a great week.

Would you choose to compromise your principles and your boundaries for the sake of a better life or would you choose to do the right thing but it would compromise your way of achieving a better life?

 One night, I went to 7-11 to buy milk powder then as I enter the store, I saw an Asian guy sitting but he seems to be drowsy, and it looks like he is drunk.

On the cashier, there was this another Asian guy with two Filipinas who accompany him as they are items that they have chosen. As they finished, one of the ladies is trying to give the flower to the staff but the staff refuses then as they approached towards the door, they called the drowsy Asian guy sitting. Both of these Asian guys where drunk but it is good that the two ladies are there to accompany them to their place.

When they were gone, it is now my turn to pay my item then I asked the staff, if she knows if there is a flower vendor around the area and I forgot to ask those Filipina ladies where they got those flowers, well probably it was a gift from those Asian guys.

The staff responded that she doesn't have any idea, but she asked me this question. Do you think, those ladies have a romantic relationship with those Asian guys? I gave her an honest answer and I said no, those girls are escorts and from what I observed from their behavior, it is not a romantic relationship should do.

Then the staff told me that one of the ladies is trying to give her the flower, but she refused, and she doesn't need that, but she took a pity with the situation of those ladies because for the reason that these ladies future is uncertain and wasting themselves over those guys.

She told me her story that she came from the province and make a sacrifice by working in the city to support herself and her family. I told her, good for you because even though that you are struggling right now or not earning as compared to them, you live a decent life and have a peace of mind.
These ladies probably during their time of struggle they have no one to turn to or may not be eligible to access any opportunities around that is why even though being an escort is risky, they have to compromise their principles, boundaries and what they value within and take the risk of being an escort otherwise they have nothing to feed for themselves and their families. They only see it as a road to a better life.
Their situation is sad but that's the reality and all we simply need to do is widen our compassion with these people and we are grateful enough not to experience the harmful issues they face especially if they encounter difficult clients. Returning to a normal life can be a challenge for them because some people know them for who they are and what they do. They do feel degraded, but they have no choice.

Just like them there are some instances in our lives that we compromised what we value, principles and boundaries to get what we want but later on we are spreading ourselves too thin that we forget what matters to us and despite of the success, we still feel that there is lacking or nothing however those people who are firm with their principles, they compromise their way to success and their reputation because they don't follow what other people dictates and they see the bigger picture and are not bothered by their conscience because they knew that doing the right thing brings inner peace and the truth sets them free. You are living authentically with no regrets which is a beautiful thing but not all have the bravery or have a strong conviction to do it. A rare thing that happens to some.

It may seem difficult, or we may find it too late to achieve that authenticity and the inner peace we need however if you start believing yourself and be intentional by being a better person to yourself and others & you are working on it little by little then your efforts will yield a great result because you live by it.

Listen to your body's call to Self-Care

 

We have a good impression to someone who is active, a type of person who says yes to everything and those who multi-task either it is on personal or professional lives. We see this person as dependable, responsible or whatever good qualities we may add to it however the more we take a lot of commitments and tasks to our plate whether it is for ourselves or for others, what we failed to notice are the following, we spread ourselves too thin, we lose sometimes our authenticity and eventually we lose our ability to look after ourselves.

For those who practice Self-care, some people perceived it as selfish, it is for the weak, having a narcissistic tendency, avoidance to escape responsibilities or an excuse for other people to be indulgent to their vices and addictions.

We have lots of misconceptions about Self-Care however a genuine Self-Care is all about your body's way of regulating and protecting it from stressors whether it is physical, emotional and mental aspects. When we ignore the need to Self-Care, we cannot function to our best, it also affects our relationships and our way of life.

Each one of us have our own set of needs, values, priorities and commitments and before we even follow the self-care practices of others that are trending, we have to carefully assess ourselves, our boundaries and limits. The goal of doing self-care is to do things that we enjoy as we try to nurture our bodies. It has to be attainable and practical. For example, eating healthy foods is your approach to self-care however if you are consistently breaking the bank for you to attain it, then it will only leave you overwhelmed and frustrated. That's not anymore self-care but self-pain.
Personally, I keep my self-care practices simple and easy to do. Let me share to you my 5 Self-care practices with a bonus that you may also benefit from it.

First is "Walking," we have read lots of articles about the health advantages of walking but some of us tend to ignore it and simply prefer to take transport for travel even on short distances however for me, walking helps me regulate my mood especially if I am having a stressful day, low mood and bored. It also helps me find my inspiration and creativity and there are times that I have to make a decision or solve the problem, walking helps me gain clarity and solutions starts to pop up for me to make an action.
For those who wants to practice Walking as their way to Self-care, my suggestion is to start from 30 minutes and as your body becomes adjusted with the time then it is time to increase it 1 hour or 2 hours or increase. You may also incorporate it to your daily activities for instance, when going to work instead of commuting and spending money for it then walk. If you have a dog or taking care of a child then bring them to park and walk with them and as you walk enjoy the simple beauty of the nature you are in.
Make sure that you perform breathing exercises, stretching, warm up and cool down when you walk. Walking is a simple physical activity that doesn't require you to pay for gym subscription, it is free!

The second Self-care practice is healthy eating. I do believe that what you eat consistently does have long term effects to your body for example, during your youth, you love eating Barbecues that is grilled on a charcoal so as you grow old, your body system starts to deteriorate and you easily get Cancer as compared to those who eats less of it and what more if you family have a history of Cancer.

There lots of diet fads that are roaming around the health and wellness magazines and online and we are attracted to people shown some results from obese to slim using those diet fads however as we tried to apply the said diet for ourselves and it didn't go well as we hoped we become frustrated and with this before we apply those kind of fads, listen first to what your body truly needs. It doesn't mean that works for others, it will also work for you.

Notice your symptoms and ask yourself if do you feel sluggish, anemic or have medical conditions either you are unaware of or having any existing ones? From there, have a laboratory examination of what nutrients you are lacking and seek consultation with health professionals about your diet plan. For those who doesn't have any health conditions, always eat a balance diet. Note, which foods gives you the boost of energy or have any effects. 
Having health supplements and medications are great however healthy eating on a daily basis helps us to prevent severe health conditions in the future.

Next in line for Self-care is the importance of rest and sleep. Let me share you my experience when I was working as a Carer in one of the Nursing homes in the UK, there was one occasion where I work for long day shifts from 6 am to 9pm for 6 consecutive days and then one of my Filipino colleagues invited me to attend one of the Filipino parties and told me to come after work so I went there and when I was about to open the door, I couldn't even do it and I even asked somebody to open it for me! It was embarrassing but that's where I came with a realization that working for several days without proper rest and sleep will truly lead your body to exhaustion and thus affects your performance.

There are some people who take 2 to 3 days off and try to get as much of a quality of sleep is a no joke. When you have that 6 to 8 hours of quality sleep you will notice that your body seems to be fully recovered from that exhaustion and you are again in top form. Having a period of rest and stillness is important to regain your strength. This is why we also need to make good use of our break times.

For working people and those who are bombarded with commitments, they have lesser time for rest and sleep so no wonder that rest and sleep are considered to be our intangible luxuries that nurture our bodies, and we need to include that in our Self-care goals.

The fourth one that I considered as a valuable Self-care practice is to practice intentional living and what do I mean by that? It is by setting our day with intention and a purpose with positivity.

There are instances in our lives that we felt that we are anxious for no reason, we felt that we are overthinking and all over the place however if we are doing intentional living, you are becoming mindful on the things that serves you for good and which isn't. You have your goal and formulate tasks such as creating "Things to do List" that serves you a direction towards that goal and in that way, you have gain control of what you want to become and be productive as the day progresses.

On a spiritual sense having a good intention and purpose deepens your relationship to yourself and others and importantly to God who has the full control of all things and helping you endure any hardships that is beyond your control.

Then lastly, is to learn how to be grateful and appreciate either small or big blessings that happened to your life. Why is being grateful connected to Self-Care? When a person learns to be grateful, he or she appreciates the value of life and accepts and has a deeper understanding about people.
This person is contented, doesn't complain or blame no one and is focus on the present in which attracts positivity and develops resilience especially on tough times which is easier for them to bounce back and continue with life seeing the bigger picture. Those people who doesn't practice gratefulness according to some studies exhibits the high levels of stress because they look for happiness from the outside which are short-lived rather than from within.

Then for the bonus part is practicing Self-compassion. We live in this world that in order to thrive and be accepted, we have to comply with the expectations from the society. This can begin from our family, friends, colleagues, neighborhood or to the whole community which sometimes cause us a lot of pressure and if we fail to deliver their expectations, we lose our self-worth and self-confidence, or the main enemy could be ourselves with our "All or None mindset" that as we fail there are no second chances around. We begin to get stuck with our mistakes from the past making us doubt ourselves by unable to try new things and take risks for the fear of failure however if we always think negatively of ourselves, we will never change for better. Although there are some people who are available to help you out, but the real help will start from you that you accepted that this situation happened, and you are now ready to change it.

Self-Compassion is another form of Self-Care in the sense that even though there is a mistake and imperfections happened, it doesn't define you as a whole person, but it serves you as learning opportunity for improvements. You are enjoying the process of your journey rather get focus on the result you are expecting.

We understand that generating Self-compassion is not easy for some because we have the tendency to Self-criticize and the All or nothing mindset gets ahead of us however if we put Self-compassion into practice whatever disappointments and negativity from others will not affect us because we know ourselves more and we focus more on our strengths, our present and what could possibly go right for you to be able to move forward and allowing ourselves to be healed.

Never underestimate your body's calling for Self-care and if your body is now experiencing it then remind yourselves about the different Self-care practices that I mentioned and have thorough assessment your needs and identify what the things that works for you and gives you the purpose to manifest something and enjoy life. If in any case that you are requiring trusted professional help to release the burden that you are carrying, then don't hesitate to do it because it is also a way that you are ready to change something about yourself positively.